Here I go again….

Right. I had two distinct dreams last night/sleeping periods. This is important.

Before we deal with current events, is there any old business? I see there is some waving of hands in the back, so we’ll deal with the old before the current.

1. Contrary to the last post’s follow-up war, I haven’t given in, but I have taken it to real-life, where me and verbally slap each other when we can.

2. Life has definitely gotten stranger, and this could be both good and bad at the same time.

There is NO gray. Black and White are absolute.

Having said that, let me take you back to a birthday party mine friend threw at her house on a Friday night two weeks ago. I had gone early to assist with the preparations, and made a wonderful batch of Special Brownies. I was NOT joined by anyone I knew, esp. Hadas, who is observant of the Sabbath rituals. Oh, by the way, in case you were wondering, we had been spending a lot of time together, and I was wondering if it was going to get any more serious, as I REALLY like her! Anyways, I had gone earlier to make foodstuffs, and succeeded wonderfully. They were a great hit, and the 20-odd people there enjoyed them thoroughly. At some point, I got into some deep conversations regarding reality, illusions, and perception of life with a nice lady, Y, and we went on for hours. I seemed to have struck a chord, as by the time she left, she acknowledged one of the concepts we had been discussing seemed to be accurate by my explanation.
Now, yes, she’s attractive, and I’m no monster myself, and I toyed with the idea of asking her for her number, but had the internal conflict of, “I’ve got my eyes on another…” so I didn’t. Also at the party, whom I had completely missed, as I was tripped out on E, was D. D. is a fascinating lady, who also is attractive, and we’ve talked before, but again, nothing happened. In any case, I got home at about 5am, and crashed until the next day.
This all happened during the weekend between shows of “Free to Be…” and I haven’t discussed much about that at all, because I’m jumping around anyways, so try to follow at least ONE plot line. (Hey, my life is an episode of 24!)
Saturday night, another show, another success.
Sunday night, our only night off, half of us go to audition for ANOTHER show, and it was fun to meet new actors, sing a bit, and play around. It ended up as nights have been ending up a lot, with me and Becker at my place watching “‘Allo ‘Allo”.
So, Monday continues, and shows go on, and I spend some time with Hadas here and there. On Tuesday, she told me that she needed to be in Tel-Aviv the next day for some legal issues (not hers) and that her friends were supposed to come with, but crapped out on the last minute. Very considerately, I offer to go with her, so she wouldn’t have to go alone, and I saw it as an opportunity to spend more time with her.

Tuesday was also the day she came to the show. After the show, instead of going out to a cafe to get a coffee, we visited a friend who is recovering from serious dental surgery. When we left her place, we heard a loud boom, and then debated what it was, until we heard the sires, and started making phone calls.
I walked her home, and we sat outside for about 2 hours, neither of us wanting to go home, to hear all the details. Eventually, she went up, and I walked home.

So we set out Wednesday to Tel-Aviv, and on the way, she gets a call from the lawyer that she isn’t needed after all. She’s kind of exasperated, as she should be, and we get to Tel-Aviv with not a clue of what to do.
Brain flash! Let’s take a walk across the Ayalon bridge! It’s free, it’s beautiful, and this way our trip hadn’t been wasted. So we cross, and on the other side, we enter the “DiMall”, a very upper-class spot, and both of us are not dressed like the typical TLV yuppies, but we stroll around and act very uppity, enjoying every moment of it. In the mall, we find a bookstore, and spend a while checking out books, and talking, and having a great time. We purchase about 50NIS worth of books, coloring books, and stuff, and eventually mosey on back across the bridge to the bus station home. On the way back, we both nod off, and awake in Jerusalem. The only thought going through my mind was how beautiful she was, softly breathing, sitting right there next to me.
She came back to my place, where we hung out for a bit, and I walked her home.
On the way, she brought up our “relationship” and pretty much put it clearly that her experience with non-observant relationships doesn’t work, and religion is the one thing she won’t bend on. Essentially, she said that there’s no future for US, “but we’ll still be friends…” She might as well have shot me right then and there.
So I smile, and accept and respect her wishes, even though it’s tearing me up.
I get to warm up for that night’s play, depressed. I wanted to go home, and drown my misery so badly that I would forget it ever happened. Instead, I had to smile, sing and dance, and veil my own life for the people that came to see the play.
I felt like I had no energy or will to do that show, but I was determined to go out there and put on the best performance I had, in spite of myself. The mark of a true actor. Anyways, that was the night that came to see the show, and she can be the judge of it.

So time proceeds, as it always does, inevitably, and we finished off with a great performance at Hadassah Hospital, and had a nice, quiet weekend, and for a late afternoon meal, Hadas and I went to my friend J’s. It was awkward for me, and I suddenly felt it hard to read Hadas. It feels painful.

Anyways, last night I had callbacks for the other play I auditioned for, and they went very well, and hopefully I’ll know soon whether or not I’m in.

Back to my opening line, I had a dream last night.
I dreamt that I was in A apartment, not mine, and I don’t know whose. Two ladies from the cast of FTBYAM were there, and I suddenly noticed that the oven was aflame. I have clear memories of dousing the flames, and it seemed very urgent, as the gas tube was alight as well.
I woke up in a sweat at 5am, and tried to go back to sleep.
I woke again at 9:30ish, with the distinct impression that I now remembered another dream, and this one was more of a viewing, non-participating dream, about a kid on a skateboard crossing a street, and someone on a bicycle hitting the skateboard, and falling. Being upset, he got up, and kicked the kid’s board out from under him, resulting in the kid falling.

Now, the main thing that struck me as odd about both of these is the fact that I remembered them at all, and for the past, I don’t know, 10 years, I haven’t remembered a dream at all.

What’s going on?

  • kahnman

    Thus ends yet another episode of the
    Twilight Zone [Tm]
    Too too too Too too too TOO.
    Bwwwwwoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop!
    Have no idea what the dreams mean, but they both sound like a reflection of your [relationship related] frustration, and you trying to douse the flames of your anger? “How’s that for a my crack-pot analysis?” says the dude who’s had nightmares nearly every single night for five freaking years. [That will be 0.02$ to be paid next time I see you ;-)]

    Sorry I couldn’t get a chance to see you sing and dance in a bathrobe.

  • miketheman

    the Twilight Zone for me. 🙂

    I really have no clue as to any connection, but you’ll still be able to see me in my slendor and glory on tape, CD, or DVD, as soon as I start editing the damn thing.

  • nightface

    I’m glad I get to see your slendor rather then splendor. Does that mean there will be less of you to go around?

  • nightface

    Seriously?

    2 dreams. 1 sounds like success, victory over threat or danger and the other sounds like interference and/or failure.

    Maybe all it means is that you’ve been shook up recently and there are all kind of options ahead – success, failure or who the hell knows.

    As someone else who rarely, if ever, remembers dreams, I don’t have much practice in the interpretations.

  • joshbrown

    1. “Contrary to the last post’s follow-up war, I haven’t given in, but I have taken it to real-life, where me and joshbrown verbally slap each other when we can.”
    Werbally? VERBALLY? I have only just regained any feeling in my left arm from that last “verbal” slap.
    2. As for your love life, I want you to know that if you really need a shoulder to cry on, you can rely on me (to find you someone else).
    3. Seriously now, about Hadas – I can’t say ‘I told you so’, as I never actually said anything to begin with, but I have to be honest with you. I never thought it would work. As much as I like you and treasure our friendship, the fact that she is religious and you are so not religious is something that I knew would get in the way. Of course, your religiousity (or lack thereof) is something personal. But I could tell at the start that her being religious was a little too important to her for your relationship to work.
    4) Anyway, weren’t you ‘complaining’ last week that you were being overrun with girls calling you? Okay, you may have wanted to be with Hadas, but still, you have this selection (and from what I know of them, they are all worth it) to choose from.