It’s been over a month, far longer than I should ever go silent.
After all, I’m a talkative kind of guy.
Life is so terribly odd.
I was unemplyed for the longest time. I jumped on the first job I found. Now I don’t know if that was the best thing for me to do.
I feel trapped, in a dead end, looking for the pinpoint of light amidst a sea of darkness.
There is no turning back. There are no second chances. History is not mine to change.
I’ve never been the one to think about the “what if”s of life, preferring to live with my choices and experiences. For some reason, I have begun to contemplate these circular, useless, time-wasting concepts.
Intellectually, I know it’s no use…. I guess some kind of emotional thing has me going. Stop. Think. Rationalize.
For a while now I guess I’ve been trying to really find that one thing, that feeling, that sensation, which will let me REALLY let go. I try hard to acheive it, but I don’t know anymore if that is attainable.
Or maybe it’s just the tetrahydrocannabinol talking.
I got a Powerball on Friday. For those unfamiliar, check out www.powerballs.com. It’s cool and flashy. It also has some awesome physics behind it, and has a unique feeling. Ask me to try it.
Anyways, I’m feeling really down right now. And with my dumb luck, it’s Monday tomorrow. I hate Mondays.